Visitation (FB Post)

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Tonight was the visitation for our bouncy boy. We love a theme in our family, so, of course we already owned Levi’s shirts. We didn’t even discuss what we would wear- we just both knew we wanted to wear these shirts that so proudly proclaimed “Levi’s.” Yes, we belong to him. We are his, and he is ours. 
In the midst of this ultimate tragedy, we feel grief and anger and sadness and confusion encompassing our every thought. Yet, there is so much beauty hiding in this pain: 
Our friends who stocked our fridge, folded our laundry, and even checked to make sure my husband’s suit was clean- all before we even arrived home. My family, who has held us, shielded us, helped us plan a funeral. The countless people who have shared Levi’s story and sent us heartfelt messages. 
Tonight was the most painful, beautiful night of my life: family, middle school friends, high school friends, and college friends who drove across states to visit us. Members of our community, strangers, coming with broken hearts and tears in their eyes just to hug us. Our families, anticipating and meeting our needs before we even articulate them. Levi’s preschool teachers, who appreciated and understood him. Friends showing up with crafts and toys and snacks for my girls. Best friends, acquaintances, co-workers, moms I’ve passed in the hallways at preschool, all of them showing up to hug us and share their favorite Levi story. My cousin, twin sister, brother, and many friends acting as bodyguards, ready to shield us from too much emotional stress and constantly pushing us to drink water and take a break. My girls’ teachers, babysitters, and coaches coming to sit with them, hug them, spoil them. Wine and bourbon appearing on my kitchen counter. Beautiful flowers lovingly chosen in Levi’s name. Our friends from this final beach trip flying in from 5 other states to stand with us, just as they did last Sunday night.
Woven into this deep, unimaginable sadness is so much love from special people on our lives’ paths. We are tumbling in an abyss, but each of you who came tonight and all of you who have reached out in support, joined together tonight to help catch us. Please don’t let us go.

Comments

  1. RITA CARMENNovember 17, 2019 at 1:57 PM

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